CFT and Family Dynamics: Navigating Holiday Parties with Compassion in Toronto, ON
Family harmony is a classic theme as we approach the holiday season. Images of family members reuniting with open arms, smiling, laughing, and interacting in peaceful ways are common. We see these depictions over and over, both in advertisements and the curated content of social media. But let’s be honest… for the most part, holiday family gatherings are far from the idealistic holiday experience.
While some people are lucky to have peaceful connections with family over the holidays, many of us can face acute stress, struggle with setting healthy boundaries, and often find it difficult to manage conflict with our families. Building self-compassion through Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) in Toronto, ON offers a transformative approach to these moments. CFT, rooted in fostering kindness and understanding toward oneself and others, provides mindfulness tools to navigate the often-challenging terrain of family holidays.
Signs that You Might Struggle with Family Interactions over the Holiday Season:
Increased anxiety. Noticing that you’re feeling more anxious or stressed at the thought of attending family gatherings
Anticipatory stress. You find yourself ruminating and anticipating potential conflicts or uncomfortable interactions.
Increased Isolation. You notice that you want to withdraw or avoid family entirely to avoid potential discomfort.
Changes in Mood. You experience significant shifts in mood or emotion when thinking about family events. You might even notice increased irritability towards your partner or close friends.
Difficulty Setting and Maintaining Boundaries. You tend to lack boundaries with your family and struggle to communicate what’s okay and what’s not okay.
Negative thought patterns. You experience increased negative thoughts as you anticipate harsh criticism or judgments from family members.
Trauma Triggers. You might experience trauma responses because family gatherings remind you of traumatic experiences from your past.
Approaching Family Gatherings with Self-Compassion
You know that this is a difficult time for you, so how can you make it a little bit easier for yourself? Here are some tips from a CFT therapist as you navigate stressful family dynamics this holiday season:
Mindfully Reflect on the Hardest Parts of Past Family Gatherings
I encourage you to mindfully check in with yourself around family dynamics. What are you most concerned about? Are there particular people who bring you the most discomfort? Are there certain activities or events that heighten conflict or stress for you?
Acknowledge the Emotional Suffering You’re Experiencing
It’s important to acknowledge what emotions you’re experiencing as you think about past family interactions. Consider taking a moment to sit with these emotions (whether it be anger, frustration, shame, sadness, loss). If it feels okay to do so, check in with your body and how it’s holding on to these emotions. You might find a compassionate body scan meditation helpful in this case. Next, ask yourself what you need right now to help you manage these emotions.
What Can You Put in Place to Help Yourself?
Reflect on what has worked in the past to help you navigate difficult family relationships. Consider new strategies that could help as well. This can include:
Setting time boundaries on how much time you’ll spend at a family event
Not inviting certain people to your family event
Creating an exit strategy if conflict feels unmanageable for you
Having a trusted person you can turn to at a family event if you need a supportive ear
Intentionally taking alone time at certain intervals to help you ground yourself. Taking breaks can also give you time to mentally recharge.
Practicing helpful self-care strategies leading up to a family event like consistent meditation, physical exercise, reflective journaling, etc.
Create your own holiday traditions alongside or in place of your typical family gathering.
Make a post-gathering self-care plan that is particularly nourishing to you. For example, spend time with someone you feel safe and calm with. Or, cuddle with a fury friend.
Connect with People Who Get It
Remember, you are not alone when it comes to struggling with family dynamics over the holidays. It’s important to connect with other people in your life who understand what you’re going through. Reach out to MK Counselling today to talk to a CFT therapist.
Begin CFT Therapy in Toronto, ON Today!
If you’re ready to access professional support, a CFT therapist in Toronto, ON can help you make a comprehensive plan for navigating family dynamics this holiday season. If you think we’d be a good fit, I’d love to hear from you. Follow the simple steps below to get started!
Navigate holiday parties with self-compassion and ease!
Other Services I Offer As a CFT Therapist in Toronto, ON
I offer customized services at Michelle Kent Counselling and Psychotherapy to meet your unique needs. I offer young caregiver therapy, stress and burnout therapy, grief counselling, and more.
