Chronic Stress and Burnout: Healthy vs. Unhealthy Coping Strategies
If you’ve experienced chronic stress and burnout, you know that developing the right coping strategies is key to recovery and building resilience. As an Internal Family Systems (IFS) and compassion-focused therapist, I've seen how chronic stress can seep into every aspect of our lives. Today, let’s take a gentle, holistic look at the difference between healthy and unhealthy coping strategies and why choosing nurturing methods is crucial for our overall well-being.
What Are Coping Strategies?
Coping strategies are the methods we employ to deal with the stressors and challenges that life throws our way. These can include activities, behaviors, or thought patterns that help us manage our emotional and psychological well-being.
Understanding Proactive vs. Reactive Coping Strategies
Before we dive into specific coping strategy examples, it’s helpful to distinguish between reactive and proactive coping strategies.
Proactive coping strategies are the measures we take ahead of time to prevent stressors from arising or to minimize their impact. These strategies are all about anticipation and preparation. For instance, maintaining a healthy lifestyle, setting realistic goals, and establishing a strong support network are proactive approaches that build resilience and create a buffer against potential stress. By investing time and effort into these preventative measures, we can reduce the likelihood of becoming overwhelmed when challenges arise.
On the other hand, reactive coping strategies are the actions we take in response to stressors that have already occurred. These strategies help us manage and navigate the immediate impact of stress. Examples include practicing mindfulness to calm an anxious mind, seeking support from friends or a therapist during a crisis, or engaging in physical activity to release built-up tension. Reactive coping is about being adaptable and resourceful in the face of challenges, allowing us to regain balance and move forward despite what we might face.
Healthy Coping Strategies
Healthy coping strategies are those that promote our overall well-being and help us process stress in a way that is constructive and beneficial. Here are a few examples:
Mindfulness and Meditation: These practices encourage us to stay present and grounded. They can help reduce the noise of our inner critics and bring a sense of calm and clarity.
Exercise: Physical activity is a great way to release built-up tension and produce endorphins, which are natural mood lifters.
Connecting with Others: Human (and animal) connection is a powerful antidote to stress as it can provide co-regulation for our nervous systems.
Creative Expression: Engaging in creative activities like painting, writing, or playing music allows us to process our emotions and express ourselves in a non-verbal way.
Building your own “5 senses” reactive coping toolkit: This is a great way to plan ahead for coping “in the moment”. Put together a little kit with items that engage one of the five senses. For example, include a scented item like essential oil, a textured item like a rock or fabric, a sour candy for taste, an item that makes a distinctive sound, and something visual like a picture of something or someone you love.
Use this kit when you’re not under stress by taking time with each item and noticing how engaging with the senses makes you feel. Then, you can bring it with you in situations where you might feel triggered and be ready to cope with what comes up internally for you.
“Unhealthy” Coping Strategies
Unhealthy coping strategies, while they may provide temporary relief, often lead to more significant problems down the road. These strategies tend to avoid or numb the feelings associated with stress rather than addressing the root cause. Here are some common examples:
Substance misuse: Turning to alcohol, drugs, or excessive caffeine can provide a temporary escape but often leads to dependency and further health issues.
Avoidance: Ignoring or avoiding stressors may provide short-term relief, but it often results in increased anxiety and more significant issues later on.
Isolation: Withdrawing from social interactions and isolating oneself can exacerbate feelings of loneliness and depression, making it harder to cope with stress.
Procrastination: Delaying tasks and responsibilities can lead to increased stress and anxiety as deadlines approach and pressures mount.
Excessive Screen Time: Spending excessive amounts of time on screens—whether it’s binge-watching TV shows, playing video games, or scrolling through social media—can lead to avoidance of real-life issues and contribute to a sedentary lifestyle.
Negative Self-Talk: Beating ourselves up over our perceived failures or shortcomings can exacerbate stress and damage our self-esteem.
Overworking: While it may seem productive, working excessively without breaks can be a type of avoidance that can lead to burnout.
Dissecting "Unhealthy" in Coping Strategies
When we label a coping strategy as "unhealthy," it’s important to understand what this means. An unhealthy coping strategy is one that, while it may offer immediate relief, can ultimately harm our physical, emotional, or psychological well-being. These strategies often mask the problem rather than address it, leading to a cycle of stress and avoidance.
In the IFS model, we view all parts of ourselves with compassion, including the parts of us that adopt these “unhealthy” coping mechanisms. These parts are often working really hard to protect us from pain or discomfort. By acknowledging and understanding their intentions, we can begin to guide them toward healthier strategies that serve our overall well-being.
Embracing a Holistic Approach
Coping strategies are not a “one size fits all” strategy. As complex and holistic beings, our approach to coping with stress must consider every aspect of ourselves. This means recognizing the value of healthy coping strategies and being gentle with ourselves when we fall into “unhealthy” patterns. In other words, it means making a commitment to practicing certain strategies on a regular basis and noticing how they’re working or not working. As you experiment with new strategies and observe their effects, you can adjust and try out new ones as needed. Ultimately, it’s not about perfection but about progress and self-compassion.
Seeking Support & Building Resilience
Developing coping strategies is not about eliminating all the stress in our lives, but rather, developing a different relationship to it. Chronic stress may be a constant for many of us, but with the right tools and mindset, we can manage its impact effectively. Seeking support from a professional can help you begin incorporating healthy coping strategies that honor your whole self and help you understand the intentions behind your unhealthy patterns as well.
Start Stress and Burnout Therapy in Toronto, ON Today!
If you are ready to get support with understanding and developing your own healthy coping toolkit, I’d be happy to work alongside you on this journey. As a burnout therapist, I’m happy to offer support from my Toronto, ON-based practice. You can start your therapy journey by following these simple steps:
Book a free consultation today!
Learn more about my therapy process
Start coping with burnout in healthier ways!
Other Services Offered by Michelle Kent
Stress and burnout therapy isn’t the only service I offer support with. I’m happy to offer support with a variety of other services including counseling for young caregivers, grief counseling, CFT Therapy, and more. Visit my blog or about page to learn more today!
