Feeling Burned out? Here’s How to Talk to Your Partner About It.
So… you’ve started to notice some signs that you’re experiencing burnout. Maybe you’re having trouble concentrating, experiencing low motivation, or you’re way more irritable than usual. You’re noticing most of your time is spent on work or school tasks, with very little time for your personal life. Perhaps your sleep is affected. Or, you’re not “performing” to your usual standard in work or household duties. Is alcohol becoming a more frequent way of “taking the edge off” after a long day? Join MK Counselling and Psychotherapy as I go over how stress management counselling in Toronto, ON can help your relationship and stress!
What is Burnout & How Can Burnout Therapy in Toronto, ON Help?
Burnout is deeply individual, but it can affect the people around us, too. We may even feel the need to isolate when we’re burnt out, but this a time when it’s important more than ever to reach out to our loved ones for support. And if you’re feeling like it’s super hard to tell your partner about how you’re feeling, you’re not alone.
Common reasons it might be hard to seek burnout therapy in Toronto, ON:
Mental Health Stigma. You’ve internalized this societal view that experiencing burnout is a character flaw or a weakness. So now, you feel the need to hide your true feelings from the people you love the most.
Falling short of your own expectations. Maybe you’ve held yourself to such a high achievement standard, that admitting burnout would be admitting a deep personal failure.
Threat to personal Identity. You fear that talking about burnout could threaten your sense of self as a reliable partner, a high achiever, or a provider.
Fear that your partner may think of you differently. You’re worried that if you share your struggles, your partner will judge you, lose respect for you, or question your strengths.
How Exploring Burnout Therapy in Toronto, ON Can Help Your Relationship
As you can see, it totally makes sense why you might feel apprehensive to talk to your partner about burnout. Unfortunately, if you avoid speaking to your partner about how you’re experiencing burnout, your relationship can start to suffer in the following ways:
Your anger and irritability are more frequent, which can lead to a significant breakdown in communication.
Quality time together suffers, leading your partner to feel confused, rejected, or unappreciated in the relationship.
You feel disconnected from one another because your emotional or mental capacity is at an all-time low.
Resentment can build in your partner if they feel like they’re taking on more of your household duties and they don’t understand why.
Communicating about Burnout
But wait, don’t fret! Starting an open dialogue can help your partner know what’s going on and help avoid the negative impacts on your relationship. In fact, being honest about your experience can even help strengthen your bond during these hard times.
How to Talk to Your Partner About Your Burnout Symptoms:
Ask your partner to set aside time to talk one-on-one.
Find a calm activity or environment to have a discussion!
going for a walk to your favourite park or farmers’ market
plan a date to the local coffee shop
find the perfect spot for a Sunday picnic
Let them know that you haven’t been feeling like yourself lately.
Let them know that you’ve noticed some changes and get specific about your burnout symptoms. Sometimes writing down talking points ahead of time can help you organize your thoughts.
Tell your partner why it’s important for them to be informed about your burnout.
This is an opportunity to acknowledge how your symptoms may be affecting them, and how much you value the relationship.
Share some of the ways you intend to take care of yourself and relieve some of the symptoms of burnout, like adjusting work hours/ workload, developing better work or personal boundaries, developing a stronger self-care plan, talking to a therapist, etc.
Ask them how they are managing, what responsibilities they can or cannot take on, and make plans to have regular check-ins with each other over the next little while.
Ask your partner to be patient with you.
Even though you have the awareness and you’ve started taking steps to help yourself, it can take a while to build up your capacity again. Get specific about certain tasks or responsibilities that you might need some support with over the next little while. For example: “I know I usually pick up our dog from daycare on Wednesdays, but do you think you can take that on for a few weeks?”.
Optional: Ask them for feedback.
Often our partners know us really well, and sometimes, they’re attuned to certain behaviours or patterns that we’re oblivious to ourselves. They might have some great ideas for what might help us. Of course, it is ultimately our responsibility to tend to our own needs, but getting a partner’s perspective can bring new ways to heal and grow after burnout.
Seeking a Burnout Therapist in Toronto, ON for You or Your Partner
Always remember that these steps are only general suggestions and that every relationship has its’ own complex dynamic and needs. Talking with a qualified therapist can help you explore the unique nature of your relationship more in-depth and ultimately develop a personalized plan for healing burnout symptoms while maintaining communication with your significant other.
Begin Burnout Therapy in Toronto, ON Today!
Feeling burnt out and struggling to connect with your partner? You're not alone. Join MK Counselling and Psychotherapy as I dive into the world of burnout therapy and explore how open, honest communication can reignite the spark in your relationship. Follow these few steps to begin:
Enjoy your life without stress dragging you down.
Other Services I Provide As A Stress Therapist in Toronto, ON:
At Michelle Kent Counselling and Psychotherapy, I offer comprehensive counselling services in addition to burnout therapy and stress management counselling to meet your diverse needs and support your therapy journey. A dedicated online stress therapist is here to provide you with a safe space to navigate these feelings. Explore my additional therapy services in caregiver stress counselling, anger management therapy, self compassion therapy, and more.
